Author Archives: Carleana

Seeking your help…November 5, 2020

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Hi everyone… If you or anyone you know is dealing with bullying – the bully, the bullied and/or the bystander, I would love to hear about their experience(s).  This could be bullying at school, children K-12 and/or post-secondary.  It could be workplace harassment.  It could be domestic violence, elder abuse, anything.  I would prefer you (they) reach out to me privately.  I can be reached via instant message through FB; Carleana De Wilde.  Confidentially will be honoured for anyone who contacts reaches me.  I’m trying to understand what is currently happening out there; and how it’s changed – or if anything has changed – over the past eight years; and how Covid19 may or may not have impacted bullying in our environments.  For more information, please feel free to ask me.  Thank you!   

Thank you!

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A special thank you to the following organizations who are graciously supporting and helping Artistically Speaking Out Against Bullying help those impacted by bullying.

Orchestra London
Northeast Community Conversations
NELCE & LIHC
Survivors of Suicide Loss; Remembering Nicolas
Your Life Counts
The Grand

Update on ASOAB events

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Saturday evening, November 16th, Sandy White spoke about bullying and ASOAB at the Youth on Fire event. Sandy shared that the performances were very nice.

Chelsea De Kelver, Katharina Kiewiet, Sandy White and Carleana De Wilde attended the Rhapsody in Blue concert on November 17th. Orchestra London’s Pop classic was amazing. Airat Ichmouratov added a lovely Russian flavour to the after while Kornel Wolack and Chris Donnely were brilliant on the clarinet and piano respectively.

In the photo from left to right, Chelsea De Kelver, Katharina Kiewiet, Carleana De Wilde, Kornel Wolack, Chris Donnely and Sandy White.

ASOAB at Orchestra London

Sunday evening, Carleana presented and lead a discussion about bullying with the London Seekers. The conversation was both engaging and inspiring. Brief discussion transpired about offering support specifically to adults impacted by bullying. More to come.

Artistically Speaking Out Against Bullying (ASOAB) in motion…

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(originally posted 7 August 2012)

Just a very quick update~

I may have been away attaining new certifications and gaining to experiences but, I certainly was not idle. In June, I was in California where I attained my Soul Coachingr accreditation.  An amazing skill and very much in line with the work I do professionally, but more importantly with those impacted by bullying.  July, I travelled to Spain in order to take my Camino de Santiago de Compostella.  If you’re interested in learning more about my experience visit http://carleana-csc.blogspot.ca/  You’re welcome to share this with others too.

While I was away, I learned ASOAB’s nomination for the Innovation Community Pillar Award did not make the finals.  While that is unfortunate news for us, the fact remains we were nominated and that is amazing.  Congratulations to the finalist and best of luck in November.

Also, ASOAB has officially become a registered non-profit organization.  This gain will allow us to move further ahead in our plans.  We’ve had so many organizations and people interested in what we do, so this should open more doors.  The next administrative step will to apply for registered charity status; but one step at a time.

I continue to meet with organizations that are very interested in putting the ASOAB program in their format.  It is my hope that ASOAB will soon be running a full fall program as well as several workshops over the next few months.

From a community perspective we’ve had a few personal donations come in which I’ll share more about later.  As well, I had responded to a news paper article on another child loss to suicide related to bullying, and I submitted my thoughts.  I have received positive feedback as well; it has opened some amazing new doors for us.  Hopefully you are able to open this Block Parent link http://www.thecommunityfocus.com/ as my response was included in their current issue of “The Community Focus” on page 12.

If you have any questions or concerns; or would like more information about ASOAB, please do not hesitate to contact me.

Carleana De Kelver CSC; CPLC
Artistically Speaking Out Against Bullying
Founder/Executive Director/President

“It is easier to build up a child, than it is to repair an adult.  Choose your words & actions wisely!”

Recent Happenings

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(originally posted 14 June 2012)

Good day everyone….

I just wanted to take this opportunity to share some exciting news. I have been nominated for a Pillar Community Innovation Award (http://www.pillarnonprofit.ca/) for the program, Artistically Speaking Out Against Bullying (ASOAB).  I wanted to not only express my appreciation to those who’ve nominated me but also extend my sincerest thank you to the families who attended and my heartfelt thanks to those who continue to work hard with me at ASOAB;  Genevieve, Katharina, Chelsea, Angela, and Diana.

Also, Monday evening I joined Matthew Ninabar and his team from High Rise Studio (www.highrisestudio.ca) to film a short documentary on two families’ experience dealing with school bullying and how it was (or was not) handled.  As soon as this project is complete, it will be posted here on the website.

Starting next week I will be away for seven weeks. First I will be in San Luis Obispo California to ascertain my Soul Coaching accreditation under Denise Linn (www.deniselinn.com). From there, I am off to Spain on my Camino de Santiago de Compostella (www.caminoways.com). These skills will enhance the work I do with children, youth and their families at ASOAB and in my personal business.

ASOAB offers presentations, speaking engagements and workshops too.  As always, if you have any questions and/or concerns please feel free to leave a comment or email me at carleana@asoab.org.

~Carleana

Suicide and tougher bullying laws

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(originally posted 23 May 2012)

A couple days ago an article from the Sarnia Observer was sent to me.  Since then I received a couple more stories from the same community.  Rightfully so, parents and students demonstrated at the education centre office and city hall.  As the story goes, in the past two years the community has lost 10 children/youth to suicide as a result of unaddressed bullying.  I read these articles and feel the frustration this community is feeling; so I submitted my thoughts.
http://www.theobserver.ca/2012/05/23/we-need-nurtured-children-not-more-bullying-laws

In Ontario we already have a lot of legislation in place.  What we are missing is effective and efficient enforcement of these laws, policies, etc and any means of accountability when these are not enforced.  While we sit back, protest and wait for new laws (bill 13 & 14 for example) our children are killing themselves.  When we will realize, if we want change; we must be that change.  You can’t legislate for someone to protect another.  Either they get it and they do it or they don’t.  We do not have to buy into all the rhetoric that says ‘the system’ is better than the individual.  I am not saying for a single moment that we not advocate for our children, but we must also teach our children to advocate for themselves.  Generally speaking a child that feels worthy is less likely to bully or be bullied.  No school or law can inspire self worth that starts with the people who genuinely care about another.  Parents don’t be bullied into thinking you’re not good enough.  99% of what children want and need…your time, love, encouragement and acceptance.  If your child isn’t important to you, they will ask, “Who am I important too; who cares about me?”  And soon they won’t care about them self or anyone or anything…they’ll feel as though they have nothing to lose.  Celebrate life with your child everyday they are with you……

Hunger Games vs BULLY

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(originally posted 22 May 2012)

May has been a very interesting month, so far, for ASOAB.  Several new opportunities are being explored.  Check back regularly for updates.  Remember if you have any questions or are looking for assistance in handling a bullying related issue, do not hestitate to contact Carleana at carleana@asoab.org  How many of you got a chance to see the movie BULLY?  How many took in the box office ‘hit’ “The Hunger Games”?  Were your children part of the Ontario education group that were taken out of school on a ‘field trip’ to see “The Hunger Games” but not “BULLY”?  You may (or may not) be surprise to learn what the education system’s response was to allowing one movie over the other…

ASOAB Programs

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(originally posted 16 May 2012)

Artistically Speaking Out Against Bullying (ASOAB) is a holistic and innovated program designed to address bullying on many levels!

Our uniquely inspired programs help participants rediscover their self confidence and value. When people feel good about them self, they are less likely to engage in behaviours that are harmful in nature. These behaviours include, but are not limited to bullying and being bullied. While some programs within ASOAB lend them self to shorter periods of duration, the ultimate goal is to create an environment where participants and their families feel safe to speak freely, and without judgement. It takes time to establish a relationship based on mutual trust, compassion and growth. For this reason, ASOAB programs are designed to run a year (Sept/June). During that year, the goal is for each participant to not only rediscover a talent they have but also feel inspired and confident in their overall abilities. At the end of the program, participants will be given the opportunity to exhibit their work. Events such as art showings and performances will not only help ASOAB raise awareness for positive change but it will also raise funds to keep ASOAB sustainable. More importantly, it provides the participants with a chance to show case their pieces/talent. This becomes an exciting celebration for everyone, including our community.

ASOAB does offer a few short term programs as well. These programs are designed to introduce participants to ASOAB and the different disciplines available. Shorter programs are offered in a variety of ways, such as: half, three quarter or full hour sessions once a week for six to eight weeks; depending on the discipline. These sessions are for those interested in opportunities based on a more relaxed and social environment. Shorter sessions can also be added to any Bullying Presentation. In each of these cases, while self appreciation and rediscovering of self value remains the priority, they do not tend to create the same ‘safe’ environment that allows for deeper self rediscovery; as such they do not conclude with a celebration or showing.

ASOAB also offers workshops and presentations to groups and organizations. Bullying is not just about peer bullying between children and/or youth. The truth is it happens everywhere, within all age groups. Our presentations are designed to explain what bullying is vs. conflict, why it happens and what we can do about it. We will look at current and pending legislation, policies and procedures. You’re encouraged to learn what your rights and responsibilities are as well as those of your loved ones such as your children. We’ll explore how important relationships are in the bullying web and discover what roadblocks are real and which are not, when trying to address bullying. These presentations are both informative and interactive. While Bullying is very serious, the presentations are designed to be hopeful and helpful rather than empty and blame based. When you leave an ASOAB presentation, it is our goal that you’ll feel inspired to create a positive change in your environment however big or small that is.

For more information about participating in a program or organizing a presentation/workshop, please contact Carleana at carleana@asoab.org